Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Nude Blush

I miss my birds.

I miss lying on my back, staring up, and watching them fly. Watching the wind take them in one direction, then another moment the next.

I guess I have to wait for summer to really set in before I can see them in flight again, and watch, and daydream about all types of nothings.

Ah, summer. So close, so so close, and still so far. I guess that is what makes the ache for it so much more. Insert big sigh here.


Forget Kafee with Karan, the newest hot trend is Sundaes with Sai!!

For the very first time I have learnt that it is possible to get sick from talking to your worst dushman on the phone. THANK YOU SAI. I still blame it all on you. At first I thought it was just a little sore throat from talking for what, a good 6 or 7 hours? But then realization hit in when everyone asked me if I escaped from my own funeral or something. When I explained that I had choked on my coffee and it was a large triple triple, they all nodded and said that explains it all. I did my trademark O_o face, and suddenly realized that yes it explained it all. You would think it was just a random sore throat from choking. And that it would go away within a few hours. AND speaking of which I can't believe I ate three meals while on the phone. Bad bad bad. And that too, talking about icecream :@ YOU MADE ME GO EAT A COLD VANILLA CONE too!!! I blame it on you! And you eating all that chocolate encouraged me to eat my sour candy! I blame it on you!

I can't believe just a single comment that makes you choke could make me this sick. You have to have experienced this to believe it. I spent all yesterday drugged out on flu medications, I think I pretty much slept the whole day away. I couldn't breath, because my throat hurt that much. I couldn't speak, my throat hurt that much. I couldn't even eat properly. I don't know how many pots of ginger tea I drowned, okay, drank.

Today, I can swallow, I can breathe, but talk about my nose now??!! I need to carry around a separate bag just to carry enough tissues to blow my nose every 30 seconds! (Ok I exaggerate, there is no second bag)(But I do need to blow my nose every 30 seconds or so).

I cannot believe that little laugh/choke made me this sick. Honestly.

In any case, it was still lots of fun. All those attempts, and the pick up, and the hang up, and then hearing you both talk (or, argue) made me just sit there grinning my face off just listening to you - haha.

Ok it was a good day. I just wish I didn't have to be sick :irk:

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Vaseline

I don't know what to write about. It's just one of those days. Yeah, that kind. But I want to write. So here I am letting my fingers go on their own again.

Weather, meh. It's not bad, I mean it's weather, and I love every type of weather, but it's not .. you know... beautiful? Ok it is beautiful; It's wet, cold, breezy, and gray. And as we know I love gray. I love rain. I love ...weather. Why does the weather always have to reflect my mood though? When it's a blah, could be better, mood, the sky is blah could be better. When I'm jumping off the walls with happiness, the sun is shining out. Yeh kya hai?!

Well, we did have a week of amazing weather, but unfortunately I hardly even saw much of that sunshine and heat, working non stop morning till night. OK so maybe I did go outside for a few hours in between, and ran around and whatnot. In fact, the first time I went outside DURING sun hours, I was jumping with excitement because I would actually experience the warmth. My friends weren't exactly wondering what was wrong with me, else they wouldn't have been my friends, but they were a bit boggled. In any case, we had fun crossing the road. Woo.

In fact, me with my ever questioning, random mind, as we were on the median waiting for the traffic to slow while coming back, I asked: "if you were to get run over by a car, and allowed to choose which type of car you got run over by, which would you choose?"

(Yes, I ask this type of stuff frequently; don't waste time wondering.)

Max as usual, took the question literally and picked the ugliest big handicap bus going by at the same moment.

Sana as usual, was stupified by the question and asked me to repeat it a few times. Almost got run over while attempting to understand and multitask at the same time. Finally, she chose a ferrari.

As we crossed and reached the other side, I rolled my eyes and said "WELLL you didn't ask what I'd choose!"

Ki aa, they wonder.

"An ambulance!" I grin.

...


Funny. How I thought one friendship would end, and accepted it so easily. And it didn't end. Perhaps, I knew that it couldn't, that's why I accepted it so readily? I don't know. But some friends are like that: somehow, no matter what happens, you know there couldn't really be an end. Because you've become a part of each other, and share some strong bond of understanding that it's impossible to break. Who knows. There are a few people who I can think of while thinking about it. Maybe you're reading this and think that's you. Who knows.


But it is funny. I have to admit it. It really is, because it's like we spent such a long time avoiding each other, going out of the way to not communicate, even though, at some instances we had to, and when we did, it was brief and impersonal. But even when apart it was like we were still as close as ever because continually ignoring was a remembrance to our relation. The one most memorable moment during that blackout period was the guy at the coffee place asking me where he (my un-friend) was, and I just shrugged and mumbled something incoherent about him being busy and I don't know yada yada and asked for my coffee please. The coffee guy says, "If you don't know, who will?". That was like a slap on the face, or a knife in the heart, okay not so dramatic as that, but it had that similar effect, to the point of making me wonder why exactly we had become unfriends. We didn't hate each other. We were as close as anything almost. We understood each other maybe more than family could. But somehow, this. All I could do was smile, don't know if it was sadly, or wistfully, or what. But all I could do was smile. Better that, than cry. Craziest thing was that not 2 minutes after that encounter, of me making those weird excuses to coffee guy, around the corner came who else, but the one and only unfriend. Coffee guy must have been wth-ed.

And yes, it is really funny. I have to say it, but it is. Something had to happen to restart the program. But it came so easily. Days, weeks, months, of being complete strangers. And then that eye-to-eye reaffirmation of our understanding, and the reboot of the friendship. It was like just picking up the thread where it left off, as if it hadn't broken. I am not sure if it got stronger, or something else entirely. For awhile, it was certainly cautious, on both parts. But even till today, we can talk about that blackout period as if it were just a trip up while walking, just a booboo, an accident. Who knows. That's friendship.


......


So the guy who fell in love with me at first sight is married, and I am free, yipee. I don't understand. He sees me for maybe 2 minutes, and decides he is in love. So in love he is ready to buy me a car, a house, expensive jewellery, roses. All before even talking to me. We ir do alert? In any case, I had to break his heart. (Even if it was by way of his uncle telling him that I don't like his [missing] teeth.) I'm sorry, but I don't know you, I don't even like you, and I no I don't need to, want to, get married next month.

He found another girl and 10 days later he marries her.

OH-kay.


What's with this extremist loverboy attitude? Leave me alone please!

Yeah, so just when I think I am free of one, there comes another. Yeh koi lineup comittee hai?

This one is now a 16-17-18 year old thereabouts boy, cute in that babyfaced way, but nevertheless, I refuse to entertain thoughts of being a child abuser. The poor child visits my workplace each and every day. No day off. Each and every day. He's too shy to talk, how do I know? My friend Sana overheard his friends (who were standing like the royal guard outside) ask him why doesn't he talk to me, right before he summoned up his bravado to come walk in, towards...and past me. Poor, poor kiddo. I know I look like a bacha too, but .... myeh?

....


Tomorrow is supposed to be a bit nicer. Sun shining, a peek of spring again. Hopefully we can go out and play tag and hopscotch again. Word of caution, don't wear heels, or gold flats, while doing so.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

Shea Butter

It was one of those pre-spring days, where the biting cold of winter had been left behind, and the air was filled with that unending wind that tends to blowdry the world free of any traces of snow.

I realize I've mostly been writing about Love, and perhaps it has been a tedious monologue, and so to break the spell, I will, yes, write about something else.

Seasonally, it couldn't have been more beautiful, the temperature in double digits, the sun actually burning bright - it was surely the recipe for the Perfect Day.

The only thing was, the fog of the night before remained prsent over the city as thick blankets of gray cloud, obscuring the translucent blue skies, the bright sun, and consequently rendering the pleasant wind with a chill taht brutally ruined the overall effect.

Just one element, can you imagine, could wreak such a difference between discomfort and comfort, between imperfection and perfection, from attaining paradise, to remaining an undiscovered utopia.

It wasn't as if it were a horrid day - the sadness of the situation was in fact that it was so close, and yet couldn't be had. One could feel the very potential the sun had to offer, in the very way the clouds glowed while hiding it behind its folds. And one would seek, yearn, crave, almost ache for the feel of that sunshine to be allowed the burst through and grant that happiness.

But unlike the act of opening an umbrella to keep off the rain, there was nothing I could do to persuade the sun to shine through. All I could do was believe that it would. Because in the same way I knew that it would be glorious when unveiled, and therefore yearned for it so much more, that same glory of its strength would have the power to dispell the clouds that concealed it. So I would wait. Because, it would just be maybe all the more worth it when it did happen. And if it didn't, then maybe it wasn't just meant to be a sunny day that day, and perhaps, just perhaps, darkness was my luck. But I would wait.

And, so I wrote about something else this time. I can tell you honestly, I wrote about the weather. But I would be lying if I said I did not write about love.

By the way, the sun shone through.                   

Monday, March 08, 2010

Vintage

So a few days ago my and my friend went to Subway for lunch, and while waiting for our subs, he was singing tu hi meri shab hai from Gangster, and my random mind being what it is, I came up with my own version:

tu hi mere sub hai subah mein tu bhi dinner hai mera
tu hi mera lunch hai 6inch hai tu hi mere footlong
tu bani mere liye main hoon tera barbaad
kaise rahega bhala hoke tu mujhse judaa
o o o o ho ho, ohohohohhh


...

So, I've been listening to Tu hi haqiqat khwaab tu on repeat the past week. It occurred to me that I've been devouring this album in repetitive cycles since it released last year, and I am still not done with it. First Dil Ibadat, then O Meri Jaan, then Tu hi haqiqat, then Tum Mile, then O meri jaan again, then dil ibadat, and on and on it went, weeks of one song on repeat!

Recently, I wondered aloud why it's so infrequent to get such an album, with amazing lyrics, amazing music, and that hard to find amazing feel.

Takes me back (yes, flashback!) to all those years ago when MT started, and when we were considering music reviews and Naveed asked me to write something about the latest album to see what we could come up with, Gangster. I guess it was at that point of time that music in hindi movies were moving into its newer avatar, and funny thing was I only liked tu hi meri shab hai from all those songs, and I didn't think they were worthy of liking, not to mention loving.

But there we go, Gangster is on my 'love list', one of those albums wherein every song is a favourite. There aren't all that many that can boast it, but yeah. No, I am not going to write about each and everyone that does make it. But wonder why there are so few that bring out the raw beauty of music and love..

Friday, March 05, 2010

Paradise

Tera Na hona jaane, kyun hona hi hai ?Can one's SoulMate be a completely difference person from your TrueLove?

Resignation vs Acceptance • midway = ?

Resign ~ cede ; means to give over, surrender or relinquish to the physical control of another.
Resignation ~ endurance, passivity
Synonyms: acceptance, acquiescence, compliance, conformity, deference, docility, forbearing, fortitude, humbleness, humility, longanimity, lowliness, meekness, modesty, nonresistance, patience, patientness, resignedness, submission, submissiveness, sufferance.

Accept ~ admit, receive, welcome; believe the goodness, realness of something.
Acceptance ~ belief in goodness of something
Synonyms: accedence, accession, acknowledgment, acquiescence, admission, adoption, affirmation, agreement, approbation, approval, assent, concession, concurrence, favor, recognition, seal of approval .

How do we resign ourselves to love a person so completely that simply loving them alone is enough. To love them while accepting that you can't 'have' them in the abstract sense of the world.

And in accepting such fact, as much as we can call it thus, we have to resolve ourselves to the numerous natural laws that sum up our perceptions, thoughts, and behaviours.

Faith.
Faith is only really faith when tested holds strong. Even in doubtful circumstances (note, not the same as doubt alone), one must persevere in faith to attain the redemption of that faith. Like holding up a castle of cards, if you let go because you doubt it can stand, it will most certainly collapse; it is the enduring belief in what you believe in that attains the actualization of that belief.

Moirai.
Everything happens for a reason. When we get dealt a bad hand it's a sore point to swallow this truism. It is easy enough to preach to others, but we have to come to terms that it applies just as much to us in both bad and good times as to anyone else.

Soulmates?
"Somewhere out there I know there is someone, who's waiting just for me, Mahiyaa..
He's gonna set me free, Mahiyaa"
Someone, somewhere, is waiting, made for you. So, in essence, all the other relationships or relations that didn't form into relationships, were not meant to work simply because they weren't The One.

So in the mix of all these governing laws that take us forward down the stream of fate ...

How can we love a person so much taht you still accept taht whatever happens, happens, and that maybe one day there will be someone else, but still to love this person truly you still need to love them exclusively with all your heart, believing that they're the one you'd love forever?

Why is it so complicated? Or is it because it is complicated that makes it such a heavy, and thus 'important', weight. For if it were simple, would it really be worth as much?

And can it really be possible to love a person, not just simply loving them for the person they are, but what they make you be, feel - that love that is romance but not the romance that the term nowadays is meant to mean, but more, much more?

To love that person, because there is a connection, something beyond words that pulls you together in that unspoken manner. That mystical, magical magnetism that draws your very being to theirs, that makes you feel complete while with that person. And even without them, because in some way, they have become some irremovable, permanent part of your soul. Someone you don't miss when apart because they are a part of yourself, wherever you go, wherever you are; and yet someone you miss so incredibly much that it becomes a permanent ache, a deep pain embedded into your very bones. Someone you miss even when with them, because it is as if that part of your soul that is yours is also theirs and seeks to reunite itself, to become whole, complete.

Perhaps that really is the meaning of soulmate. Maybe we say it best when we call someone jaan. Maybe it's just truths that go beyond eons, from eras past, and just awaits for us to recognize this. For mere philosophy may put it in words, but no words existing could ever describe the feelings that are the words. To say 'one soul in two bodies' simplifies the eternity that is the emotion, into basic physics, into black and white. without surrendering to its colorful vibrancy.

So can it really be possible to love a person this much, and yet come to accept that you cannot be together, that they will love someone else, and be as happy, that you will love someone else and also be as happy. To be apart and be happy, while still together on some plane beyond the horizon, beyond the furthest stars, perhaps in only a flicker of reminiscence. Or to love a person so fully, and in so loving, pushing them farther away?

The North pole and South pole, so perfectly attracted in magnetism, yet they could not be more perfectly farther apart. To love, yet repel.

How could it be so possible for you to feel so...right, and yet so wrong? How can you complete each other so perfectly, as puzzle pieces do, yet to put it together so utterly impossible. Like the moon continuously orbiting the eath in some preordained companionship; like the electrons and protons of ions that say: you have this energy, I have this energy, apart, yes, we exist, but together we become perfection. Is it because nothing can truly attain perfection, or attain true perfection, without extinguishment that we can never be?



What's in a name; a rose by any other name smells as sweet. But why does it sound so right when you say my name? as if you recognizing the me in myself was a moment meant to be, that you being mine for just that tny fraction of utterance or me being yours for whatever moment in time I was in your remembrance, why does it feel like a code uncoded, a mystery unsolved, a key that unlocks?


So how does a person experience all this for another, and yet accept that maybe one day, you pass each other by, and when you pass, and keep walking, you can't look back and wonder why you feel you know this person.                   

Tuesday, March 02, 2010

Koi anjaana hai...Jaana pehchaana hai!

I don't know what it is about this blog thing, now that I've been writing it seems to be one of those habits that's become a routine. Really, there isn't much else to do online. Noone will talk on sb, because it's lacking something - it's more of a stage I guess now, more than its been before. Less people are online, maybe it's just that time of year.

Anyways. Whatever. I've always been a blogger so taking advantage of the opportunity here is just like filling another pair of shoes. Speaking of my blogs, a few of the really really old ones are gone, some deleted because of sudden changes of heart...and some just gone because their servers were that old.

I visited one of of my older ones today, after a dream that has been a recurring theme since as far back as I can remember.


LOL I found this really old one from way back when and its pretty refreshing remembering being young and full of hyperness and happiness and craziness.

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HELLO

yes this is me, the great, the magnificent, the wondrous... IQ!

(hold ur applause)

nehow, i was intending to let myself go a bit loose n ramble a bit, but im kinda runnin out of time rite now as it is. I've got less than ten minute hahahah. oh well. Any how, this is ME, intending to really really do something really new about this page. its so DRAB. its DEAD. its... bah.

as it is, time has passed, we've changed. hahahah my music tastes have DEFINITELY changed. (GO BHANGRAAAA!!!)


or not :P

heheheh ok ok ... so me's off for now :D dont get too worried if i seem too normal for u ppl. its a phase. i repeat. a phase. :D okiedokiedootsidoo.

This is IQ signin off. gnite, take care, sweet dreams. may the force b with ya.. alvida.


It's like taking a peek back in a photo album and reseeing yourself as a 12 year old. At the time you thought you might have looked geeky or whatever, but when you see yourself then now, you realize you pretty much held the world in your hands.


Sometimes I feel like I'll always be that kid. I can't really imagine myself being less than a child at heart even when I am old. It stuns me sometimes thinking that hey, I'm at this age, and soon I'll reach an age that people really do consider "old". What about my friends, what about all our fun times together. What happens when this person gets married, and that person has children. When we become immersed in another generation. All that stuff that makes up what's called 'adult'. I know I'm an adult. But, .. not REALLY?



Right. So back to the recurring theme in my dreams. I know it's sort of totally filmy, but I can't help it happening to me. Here is the blog I wrote at the time:


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First, I found "the one" ...only i don't know who he is...i had this weird weird dream..it was so realistic yet so..weird..and the dude..my "one" ...he was...okie, characteristically, tall, fair, quiet, very funny, charming, confidant, outgoing though sortof shy-ish, sporty...i see him now, but i just can't see him..if that makes sense..its like i know how he is..but he's in this shadow..u know how dreams are..hehe reminds me of Kajol in DDLJ:

aisa pehli baar hua hai satrah atharah salo mein ...

okay so i don't noe wat it means but...thats the idea anyhow
just...oh idk


Aisa pehli baar hua hai satrah atharah salo mein
Un dekha anjanna koi aane laga hai khayalon mein
Aankhon ki khidki per ek sayaa sa lehraata hai
Dil ke derwaze per koi dastak de ke jata hai
Gherri gherri kaali aankhen, mujse mujko puchhatti hai
Hathoan ki rekhaon mein ek chehra sa ban jatta hai
Uski sanse resham jaisi gallo ko chu jaati hai
Uske hathoan ki khushboo hai ab tak mere ballo mein
Aisa pehli baar hua hai satrah atharah salo mein
Un dekha anjanna koi aane laga hai khayalon mein....




And for almost 10 past years, it's like a haunting figure in my dreams. And it's always the same ..idea..of him, like I know it's always the same person, and yet I don't know who he is exactly. It's frustrating!! even though I know it could just be my own mind playing games, but there is some magical feeling like, even when I awake, that whoever he is, he really makes me happy, he makes me feel loved, and like .. hmm, well that we were made for each other! I don't know. Just thinking of that same feeling disturbs me, not in a bad way, but makes me wish I could ..solve.. this mystery, in some way. It's like not being able to see clearly and needing glasses or something and knowing you could, except you cant. AGGHHHHH. Sometimes, I wake up with that feeling like I've fallen in love. And that feeling is just so amazing. And sometimes I still have that feeling that I know him, that he is someone I know...and I just can't... put it together.

I wish I knew who my prince charming was :(. I know I sound like a bit filmy, but it's me, and I know I sound like a little kid, but hey, it's me. I just can't get over that feeling, like we complete each other so...completely ARG :irk:

Anyways recently saw DDLJ again.. I guess it's one of those faves that don't get less with time :D. And seeing it was like a brain flash because it felt like someone out there understood this 'thing' that 'happened' to me.... I remember times when every scene was something special and... just ...patanahin!!! =)...

Mere khwaabon mein jo aaye
Aake mujhe chhed jaaye
Usse kaho kabhi saamne to aaye
Mere khwaabon mein jo aaye
Aake mujhe chhed jaaye
Usse kaho kabhi saamne to aaye
Mere khwaabon mein jo aaye

Kaisa hai, kaun hai woh, jaane kahan hai
Ho, kaisa hai, kaun hai woh, jaane kahan hai
Jiske liye mere honton pe haan hai
Apna hai ya begaana hai woh
Sach hai ya koi afsaan hai woh
Dekhe ghoor ghoor ke yunhi door door se
Usse kaho meri neend naa churaaye
Mere khwaabon mein jo aaye
Aake mujhe chhed jaaye
Usse kaho kabhi saamne to aaye
Mere khwaabon mein jo aaye..


Hmmmm...Ummmmm I hope we meet.. even if it's even still in dreams. (=

Monday, March 01, 2010

For Penguins That Fly

So here it is, I've got the time, and I know there are two of you out there waiting for me to get on with my long 4 our 5 page ode to MT. I did promise it. Problem is, most of it goes beyond the surface and is pretty personal, and now I could, I doubt if I should. I can leave it at the two brief paragraphs I put down before, but even that isn't right. Anyways, this is my blog - and "I'm hot and I can do what I want." :P


Feb 28 2010. Happy Birthday!
Four official years, and here we are.
And were is here, exactly? (How do you define here? :P)
Four years later? Happy Birthday.
To a home beyond homes.
To a special place that's got a special place in a special place, my heart.
While MT is something special to us members, I don't think I could really explain just how much it is to me. Yeah, even I, Miss Wordywords, haven't the words for it.

MT is a portal that's granted me inumerous memories with so many incredible people - people one might not have found 'incredible' in other circumstances, but MT being what it is, so they have become. So 'you', reader, have become.

MT has been the place for 'hasti, masti, and dosti', and it is these 3 that keep bringing people back. Maybe it might be the most ridiculous, most random, most utterly mental moments one has indulged in, but that is just another erason behind MT's 'successful' facade.

And beyond the facade, to its very foundations, MT is a symbol of a friendship that has been the most cherished of friendships: N , S. No matter where we end up, however far or near, or however distant a time comes between, MT shall always be the Taj Mahal in my memory. Underneath it all, this foundation has been, and remains, the strongest of reasons for being so steadfastly loyal to a site that has had ups and downs, because 4 years way back when, it was our baby. ("Baby boy", S? :P) A baby conceived by hours upon hours of conversations, of finding something out of nothing, of being just dreamers, to dreammakers. So the slow progress from a 'poetry and writing' site called meresapne, our own private fantasyland of oracles, dragons, and angels (and the unrepentant devil of course!) now finds me from being a lonely blogger on my own blog called sapne, to meresapne, to here on MT's long awaited blog, reminscing about it all.

Thank you N , for keeping the dream alive. (Ah, not "those dreams", no :P) Thanks for your consistent (and not so consistent!) efforts - for also being the friend you've been along the way. For facing the computer for hours yet again after hours facing it at work. For not quitting.

Thank you S, for being the constant (and not so constant!) companion though everything. You know what I mean when I say "through it all" and still you won't really know how much I mean it, so maybe I'd best not try.

I am cutting out a lot of more personal thanks to you both because that would make this a tribute to you both, and having me sound like I am winning a FilmFare award for best actress or something, and so if I go on I just might! But you and MT are pretty much interchangeable in my mind, I can't think of one without the other.

And even though we more or less started out as a team, the weight of the real work has always been on your shoulders Nav. I hope I also represent everyone else on MT when I thank you. :D

And as busy or preoccupied we might have gotten with our lives (Boo: growing up!), MT is always the home one can come back to after it all, even if its days, weeks, or months.

So 4 years later, our home has finally gotten its renovation. Not the final model for of course MT's got a beautiful future ahead ("I have a dream..").

To the readers who have read thus far (CONGRATULATIONS!Click here to receive your prize!!), to you reader and thus member of MT, you too are special, simply because you are MT. Some of you have shared some very special memories here. There is a special apnapan here that gives it its charm. If you are reading this, you most likely know me enough to care about what I ahve to say, what I have to say might not be important to you nor is it really for anyone's benefit but my own (writing is therapeutic for me), but in any case, you know me, or somewhat know me. Perhaps you like me, maybe a little more than like, maybe you don't like me. Whatever, you are here. And I have to say thanks to all of you, because you've also provided colour to the palette of MT's rainbow.

We've had great moments of laughter, hilarity, of ranting, provoking, arguing, philosophizing, discussing, silenting. We have learnt from each other and one another in ways we recognize and ways we wouldn't think of because in every interaction we take something while giving a little of ourselves.

MT meri jaan. I've learnt alot sinec you were born. While you are still a fraction of my age, you've also taught me alot.

2006.
Dream on. You can fall in love with the concept of love. You can pour all your dreams and emotions into one person and realize it wasn't the right person to receive them. They don't make your dreams and emotions wrong.

2007.

Let go. Interactions and experiences are important in shaping a person, but at some times you have to know when to let go. There are so many things you've got to realize does not matter. Life seems much easier when you yield to things that don't matter, and when you face such an obstacle you have to make yourself ask yourself whether it does or doesn't.

There are times when you keep a door open hoping for change, and when you believe you've waited long enough, God has his ways of showing you it's time to shut the door. Others may or or may not try to comprehend it because their truth differs from yours, in that truth is a personal thing, and when you believe in your truth, it does not really matter who does or does not agree, because it simply IS.

The act of crying causes endorphins to be released in the body, hence automatically uplifting the mood.

Sometimes you feel something and you wonder why, like waiting for the bus and seeing the leaves blow on your head and the snowflakes falling from a different side and your heart feels like ":D" and you feel like laughing aisi hi - and sometimes there doesn't need to be reasons, even though they do exist, but for the moment you just enjoy it.

2008.
Perception is not Truth. People change. Most things eventually do. No matter how much we might not like it, we have to accept it, because it's just gonna happen. Even we change, and we have to allow that everything else will too. Even something as fixed as a piece of metal would change, not just physically, but perceptionally, because the way we come to look at it changes. Even what we come to accept as truth may not be the true truth because the way we look at it is limited to what we deem to be the truth.

The small things that make you happy aren't really small BECAUSE they make you happy.

I learnt that it is pretty funny the way they say "it could be worse" when you think you've got it bad, and then when you're an real optimist it's so much more beautiful the way you think you're thankful for all you have yet, then something new comes in your life and makes you realize how much more beautiful your life has just become, and you never thought it could happen.

The stars are always there, even when its cloudy, you just need to patience to wait the clouds out, and faith to see the stars when they come back out.

2009.
ALL of life's great lessons involve loss.

Sometimes you need to look at the tree rather than the whole forest, to understand purpose, and yet again, sometimes you have to remember that it isn't just one tree alone, but an entire forest, all there for a reason...Focus, but focus in a way that does not focus

That missing someone so much occurs even when they are the one you talk to the most.


Alrite now everything I learnt, but that's an idea :P

I guess I have to submit this now. Feels like I'm forgetting something now that I've typed so much O_o. Oh well.

There you go MT. Love you! And you MTians, love you too :D.

Yours lovingly ♥,
IQ!

The not so end.