“Each friend represents a world in us,
a world possibly not born until they arrive,
a world possibly not born until they arrive,
and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.”
― Anaïs Nin
Through the long and weary march of life, there surrounded me the tread of my comrades. In that knowledge, no matter how hard the path, how cold the rains, somehow I was able to keep on, because they were there.
What would life be without friendship? I cannot truly fathom the answer. Aristotle once wrote that a man could not be good without society; we’ve heard it said that we cannot be an island to survive. We are thrust among millions of beings who differ only by the minutest gene – is it any wonder that we need to create relations with one another?
Our ability to build friendships reflects our inner state of being; our capacity to rejoice in the companionship and fellowship with another being, to embrace that humanity in the other, and cherish that meeting of minds – that is what demonstrates a singular development of a person’s soul. All our knowledge and all our goodness; what is that if we cannot stretch out our hand to another person to share it?
Laughter. That’s what comes first to mind when I think of my memories with friends. Even when I was in the darkest places, even when I wasn’t able to open up and share my pain with anyone, I still was able to laugh because I had friends who would be silly and crazy. Sometimes, that was even better than sharing the pain, because they weren’t conscious or awkward. Laughter is the most beautiful subset of life, and it’s so perfect that it comes so naturally with friendship. However temporary, that is a happiness of its own.
And though it’s taken me a long time to really get to this point: the ability to open up and share your thoughts, your dreams, your worries, your fears. To expose those innermost vulnerabilities and discover that doing so is healing of its own kind. The ability to share has manifold benefits that echo over and over and out and beyond, ripples that take root so deeply within one’s psyche. To share, and furthermore—to be understood.
“Me too!” acts like glue. That ability to comprehend and relate is a magnetic and irresistible force field. And quite the opposite, to come across differences in another person allows us to grow because we learn more and expand our own cognitive horizon.
Sharing is caring. So we’ve all heard. It works both ways, no matter what direction the flow is. Even when you are giving, upon that open connection there is something coming back – however intangible and however imperceptible – you’re getting something back, and that is the essence of acknowledgement of existence; in friendship, it is called care. That’s what makes us warm inside; to know we are cared for, respected, appreciated, and loved.
Friendship is love, of course, but when you really try to get a grip on it, when you squint in the glare of the light trying to get a clearer glimpse of what this phenomenon is, it’s something unique unto itself.
There's a gift of quiet blessing only friendship can impart,
for a friend shares life with gentle hands, kind words and a caring heart.
for a friend shares life with gentle hands, kind words and a caring heart.
