4: Vibes

It's one of those things that everyone to some subconscious level understands, however, it becomes harder to express or explain it.

You put it into google, and this is how it's defined: A person's emotional state or the atmosphere of a place as communicated to and felt by others.

The ability of an individual to understand the phenomenon is augmented by their ability to experience it. Most often, like things most ambiguous, we experience feelings, emotions, certain sensations that are beyond the grasp of words.

Words are, to an extent, a tangibility. Our capacity to use words becomes limited by our comprehension or lack of comprehension. Oftentimes, there are no words within our own mental library that can sufficiently be used to explain, illustrate, or interpret that which we can only feel. 

As I have often been told,  a lot of relationships (that did not arise from blood relations), have often resulted from this phenomenon of vibes. You become exposed to the other being and in doing so, absorb that aura that is radiating, or as per the etymology of vibes, their vibrations.

We've all witness the effect of a drop of water into a well of flat water. The spreading of each wave, and the occasion of interference as it meets another. When you meet someone, it goes beyond the physical manifestation that is presented before you, there is an "impression" left upon us from that encounter. We feel good or bad about their vibes. We experience a sensation that exceeds the ability for our comprehension.

I can account for the fact that every person who has become a best friend, indeed, I experienced that vibe that told me something right away. Similarly, every job I have ever attained, within the first encounter with the person in charge of hiring me, I was hired within minutes or that very day. There is a certainty I feel within the very first encounter. Those jobs I may have applied for and did not take on were experiences of the bad sort, I usually left before completion of further interviews, or simply felt that something that was "off" about it. Similarly, there are people I may have gotten along with, being the usually amicable person I am, but I just don't feel that bond that exists with the "good vibes" sort. 

Along this line of thought, comes another of my assertions, something I have written about often (just years ago, so you won't be familiar with it unless you stalk my writing).
I believe in love at first sight.

(Part 4 of an IQ Series that attempts to explore the mysteries behind certain personal experiences.)

3: The Premonition

There is something so abstract about the bond between two people. What is it that makes a person like someone, and dislike another? What is it that makes you gravitate towards that one person out of a crowd? Or stay far from another? Why is it that we become so interconnected and close to only a few individuals out of the millions we encounter and out of a world population in billions?

Sometimes, it builds over time. A lot of time. It can take days, weeks, months, sometimes even years. Perhaps you were only acquaintances who had taken no further notice of each other, when years later, you become inseparable.

Sometimes it occurs in the blink of an eye. In a heartbeat.

I am a very sensitive person. When I mean sensitive, I do not only mean given to extreme feelings due to circumstances and mood. I mean that, but I mean more. I feel other people’s sorrows down to the very core of myself. Likewise, when someone is happy, I am giddy – there is a contagion in emotion that I always seem to be susceptible to.

In the same way, I am constantly predisposed to what I call vibes. I'm not sure how to explain "vibes", but this is what I use to explain what is even more inexplicable.

When I meet someone, I experience these vibes. It is an aura of a sort, that radiates from that person, and from these vibes I get an awareness of their state of being. Quite often, within a second of the experience, I have a premonition. And frequently, I'm not even truly aware of this premonition, but after the unfolding of circumstances, I often experience a sense of internal satisfaction that tells me, 'Yes, I knew this all along'.

A bit touch and go, however, I am very certain that there are many of you who will be able to relate to this, perhaps on some subconscious level, or even outright aware that you've experienced this. And I am as certain of this because this is the very essence of the experience.


(Part 3 of an IQ Series that attempts to explore the mysteries behind certain personal experiences.)

2: "Hey Girl" Phenomenon

While I’ve lost count of just how many people have approached me with the assertion that they know me from somewhere, it has also occurred to me that they seem familiar as well, while not as often, but often enough.

Now this statement can vary quite a lot depending on the intent with which it was said. To this effect I present to the “Hey girl” phenomenon.

So one evening, I was standing alone at the bus stop, waiting for the bus (big surprise) when this dude comes by and enters the bus shelter.

I am standing under the lamp post, listening to my music, and I didn’t realize someone was approaching until he’d actually walked right behind me. Unfortunately, I had been singing aloud, and only when I saw him, I stopped and tossed a nonchalant look in his direction, and continued to hum quietly under my breath.

He’s a relatively cute-in-a-boyish-way, desi dude, and he’s standing in such a way that every time I look up the road to see if the bus is coming yet, I’m facing his direction. So in one of these instances, he smiles at me, and I see he’s asking me something.

So I remove my earbuds, “Sorry?”

“Have you been waiting long then?” he smiled.

“Oh, umm. I’d say about 7 minutes or so,” I ventured.

“Oh okay.” He smiled again. “I think I’ve seen you before.”

I sigh to myself, and smile politely at him. “Yeah, I’ve heard that pretty often.”

He comes closer, hands in pockets, rolling on the balls of his feet. I mentally roll my eyes.

“No, I am very sure I’ve seen you before. You have a face that is unforgettable.”

“Um,” I really don’t know what to say.

“You went to U of X right?”he asks. The bus stop is right at the university intersection.

“Yeaahh… I went to U of X..” I answer, thinking that I doubt his use of the verb is the same as my use. As in, I used to go to U of X.

His eyes light up. “Yeah! I knew it! I saw you today!” He points at me with a 'gotcha' kind of gesture.

“Eerrm. No, I wasn’t on campus today. I’m just waiting for my bus because I’m coming home from work.”

Dun dun dun.


Apparently, when I was 22 years old, I didn't want to grow older. I wished that I could be 22 forever, because that seemed like the coolest number for an age to be. Double 2. Not too young, not too old.

As they say, be careful what you wish for. Years later, I still look like I'm 22, apparently. I am a child at heart, what can I say. It, ehm, reflects off the youthful glow in my face?


Example 2.

"Hey girl, I know you from somewhere" The dude remarks, while obviously checking me out.

Yeah. In your dreams. I ignore him.

"Yeah, I seen you in my dreams baby."

O_o Talk about cheesy lines. I continue to ignore.

"Hey, can I get your number?" He persists.

"In your dreams," I smile sweetly and walk away.


While still falling under the "I know you from somewhere" category, I highly doubt that the "Hey girl" Phenomenon explains the high occurrence of what I really mean. Since it certainly doesn't explain it, I can definitely put that aside as the exception that definitely does not prove the rule, and move on to the core of the issue.

And gladly. There is something just more than baffling about being singled out by that weird dude who has managed to stick himself out his (pimped-up) car window while driving by, simultaneously blasting, and lip-syncing to, "You are my chammak challo" while dance-pointing at me. Seriously?


(Part 2 of an IQ Series that attempts to explore the mysteries behind certain personal experiences.)

1: Pretty Brown Girl Phenomenon

It has often occurred to me, in multiple circumstances, where I am told “I have seen you before.”

Variations do, of course, exist to the effect of “I know you from somewhere...”, and “Your face is so familiar.”

Now, it wouldn’t be such a big deal if it happens once or twice. Yeah, pretty brown girl – not very unique, really. (Not to mention, the amazing fountain of humbleness.)

Take for example, one very vivid recollection wherein this “pretty brown girl” phenomenon could be explained.

It being one of those days where I had had absolutely no sleep for the last 24 hours, and perhaps maxing at about six (6) hours for the week, owing to the ongoing battle of balancing work with a imminently due university research paper, I enter the university lab.

As the door shuts behind me in the silence, one head pops up to observe me as I stand scanning the lab for an empty spot.

Being in no real frame of mind to pay heed much, I zombie-walk myself to the empty corner and sit myself down with my materials. The girl sitting beside me, meanwhile, has continued to ogle at me with mouth agape, from the moment I entered to the moment I notice, peripherally, that she is, indeed, ogling at me.

Again, I pay no attention, because really and truly, I am exhausted to the very core of my being, and could hardly care less about a geeky little Chinese girl staring at me through her coke-bottle glasses.

After a few moments, however, of sensing her continued gaze, I give her a quick, polite, smile, hoping it would satisfy her, or better yet, send her a subliminal message to stop. The moment she has my attention, however, she opens her mouth and timidly ventures, “You are beautiful.”

Eh?

Now let me get a few things straight. Being dead tired and neglecting sleep, of course any semblance of daily regimen pertaining to vanity would have been equally, if not more, neglected. (Nota bien, this does not include teeth brushing and showering.)

If my state of mind was any indication of my appearance, I’d describe both as that of a zombie. This being the case, you can imagine my reaction as the meaning of what she just said registered in my fatigued mind.

I blinked, “Um.” I looked at her, then left and right, shiftily, not just a little disconcerted. She smiled, apparently more relaxed.

“You ah very very beautiful. Indian, yes, no? You ah beautiful, moh dan Ashwahiya Wai.” She positively beamed at me.

Okay. I was floored. I was flattered. Zombie-day, and I am beautiful. How could my heart not be touched? But please, Aishwarya Rai?!

“Well, wow. Thank…you!” I blinked at her. I was flummoxed


Example 2.

Another flashback.

In the days when I worked with the public, often I would see a certain mother-daughter duo. The girl was about seven (7) years old, and after the first few encounters, involving her just bashfully smiling at me from behind her mother, she finally opened up.

One day, after looking at me with that wide-eyed look that you just know means she’s dying to say something and is holding back, she finally blurts, “You look like Shilpa Shetty.”

My smile froze, and my mouth opened and shut. I looked at her mother beseechingly, who just shrugged back emphatically at me.

“Umm, me? Shilpa Shetty? But, haha, how?” I asked the girl. She just shrugged back at me a number of times. (Must be something in the gene pool, this shrugging, I tell you.)

“I guess it’s your hair,” the mother offered.

“And eyes!” piped up the pipsqueak.


So under these two scenarios (of many), one could attribute the “familiar face” phenomenon to that of the general stereotype of the “pretty brown girl”.

But, outside of this phenomenon, which I have offered up as explanation oftentimes that maybe they’ve just seen a lot of Indian movies,  those who are certain they’ve seen me before have denied that this is the reason.

For myself, while I’ve lost count of just how many people have approached me with the assertion that they know me from somewhere, it has also occurred to me, while not as often, but often enough.

Is there an explanation? One does wonder.

(An introduction to an IQ Series that attempts to explore the mysteries behind certain personal experiences.)